Tonight, Tonight

1.
Man, I went to Kowalski's today, the fancy grocery store, to get some pita chips. I went in, walked around, enjoyed myself amongst the food, and went back to my car plus many pita chips and some hummus.

To my surprise, there was a fat middle-aged woman hoovering around my vehicle. I got in my car and she began yelling at me. I got out and she looked at me and in an equally enraged and pathetic voice she said, "I can't get in my car."

Sure enough, my car was parked slightly too close to hers. She could have squeezed in but her fat prevented her from any even slightly acrobatic feat. She was too large to crawl in from the other side or the back seat. She was standing there, pathetically trapped by her fat. She was cocooned in her fat, completely helpless. I was terrified and angered by this gross misuse of a human body.

I said, "Hey, I'm leaving." and she replied again, "I can't get in my car" as if she, herself, could not come to terms with how helpless she was. A wall, a foot and a half high, would have been an insurmountable obstacle for this woman. I got in my car and drove away, not looking back. I could not bear to see this blob of a person crawl in to their PT Cruiser.

I went home and ate my pita chips and watched some television. But the spectre of this woman, her fat and her pillow-y red jacket, continues to haunt me. How gross.



2.
I had to write my reaction paper today. For that hip hop class. I chose to talk about DJ Hero and Beat Mania, and subsequently the world's weird-ass relationship with hip hop. Japanese people buy turn tables and wear black face, claiming it makes them part of the authentic hip hop movement. German people bomb trains and only wear specific New York New Era hats because, despite never having been to America, only those brands and those names represent the "real" and "authentic" "Streets". The world has a weird, weird relationship with hip hop.



Side note, I really like this song. I think I'd like to get married to this song someday. And then, maybe be buried to it.




Fat people terrify me.