Temperature: Cold as balls. That are cold. Not that balls are cold.
Quit Smoking Challenge: ...has ended. I quit so hard I quit quitting.
Alright, so with the move and the new job and the crazy commutes I haven't had time to cook up anything delicious. All I gotta say is never fucking go to Dominos on White Bear Avenue. Someone's fucking grandma works there and she does not understand cars, credit cards, or, oh god, pizza. The order took 15 minutes, she told me it would be $44, and then I had to call back and find out they don't even deliver to my location. What. I called the other Dominos and they brought us the same thing in twenty minutes for $28. I don't know how it works. It just does.
I have this new job, though, where people come in and get stupid things tattooed in stupid places and I help them. It's pretty nice.
I feel like I need to provide a recipe, though. It's been awhile and I'm going to hearken back to something I used to make for friends and then tag on my macaroni recipe since it's so fucking good. Have I done the macaroni already? Oh well.
Oh God Yes...Its the Ramlette.
You will need:
-One packet of Ramen (chicken works best)
-Two eggs
-No dignity
Boil the noodles as usual. While they're boiling take the two eggs and whisk them with the Ramen seasoning. Pour the cooked noodles and the egg/seasoning mix into a lightly buttered frying pan. Cook it like an omelet.
Oh god. Eat it.
Someone here tried to dress it up all fancy. But a pig in make up in still a pig. And still delicious.
Alright, the real recipe of today. My Kraken Mac. Revealed.
You will need:
-Pasta (farfalle works best I think)
-2 Cups grated cheese (I go half swiss, half gruyere since the latter is so expensive)
-1 can chicken or vegetable broth
-1 cup milk
-a big ol titty handful of flour
-salt and pepper (I use white pepper since...my mom has it)
-vinegar
-onions
1. Bring the broth and the milk to a simmer
2. Add the flour. ADD IT RIGHT NOW and let it simmer for awhile
3. Slowly add the cheese. If you add it before the flour or throw it all in at once you will get lumpy, disgusting cheese curds.
4. Add the spices and let it all simmer gently for about 5 minutes
While all that is occurring chop up your onion in to fancy slices (French style, right? Let's call it Fancy Slices Style). Start cooking them in a pan with a little oil until they are browned and look like something you'd want to eat.
Boil the pasta.
Once all the onions, pasta, and sauce are done drain the pasta and pour the cheese sauce over it. Yum yum. Serve in bowls with the onions on top as a delicious garnish.
Why is there a picture of a cat? Because I could not figure out the picture sizing. So it is angry and confuzzled. Like me.
I haven't made the Kraken Mac myself for quite awhile. Not since around Fall of 2008. It takes a lot of trial and error, getting the cheese sauce just right. But it is so good. If you can swing it, go all Gruyere. Yes.
