The Rainbow Cake

It was my friend, Miss Emily's, birthday the other month so we made some special cupcakes. They are so easy you will shit.

Cupcakes of the Rainbow

Ingredients
-2 Boxes White Cake Mix
-2 cans Ginger Ale

Supplies
-Traditional 4-color or 6-color set of food coloring
-5 medium sized mixing bowls
-1 large mixing bowl
-cupcake trays and papers

Step 1: Preheat the oven according to the box's directions. If you don't do this right the fuck now you will forget and you will need to wait to bake your cupcakes or, worse yet, you'll throw the cupcakes in the oven while it's still heating up. This spells disaster. Just preheat it now and forget about it. You'll thank me later.

Empty out the contents of the dry cake mixture in to your large bowl. Mix it up with 2 cans of ginger ale. The ginger ale will work as the binding agent, meaning you don't have to scour your sad college student cupboards for oil and eggs. It will also make the cake low-fat, fluffy, and slightly ginger ale-y tasting. It tastes like a solid soda, a little, so you can decide whether or not that sounds good to you.

Once it's all mixed up and has no chunks in it (we didn't use an electric blender. Fuck that! We blended it WITH THE HANDS GOD GAVE US) we portioned it out in to the other bowls. We now had 6 bowls with an equal amount of cake batter in them. Now comes the colorful part.

Some math might be involved in this. The back of the box will give you heinously large proportions from which to figure out how many drops to use for colors. I just dropped 10 drops of color in for the solid colors, then 5 and 3 for the mixed ones. If you took art in elementary school you have a basic understanding of the color wheel and can figure out that 5 drops of blue and 3 drops of red is going to give you a violet shade. Just keep experimenting, a few drops at a time, until it looks like the shade you want.

Then, start layering! I suggest you layer red, orange, yellow, green, violet, blue as that's the way the rainbow fucking works. Just add a spoon dollop to your cupcake paper and gently spoon the next color over the top. Nothing fancy about it.

BAKE. Just slide the cupcakes in the oven that you remembered to preheat at the beginning of your cupcake journey. You did, right? Good.


Oh fuck yes
Now, pull them out of the oven. At this point, everyone in the living room you promised rainbow cupcakes to is freaking out. Don't let them touch your fucking cupcakes. They need to cool. Put them in the fridge for 10 minutes if you need to (don't melt shit) but make sure that they are sturdy and cool before frosting. If not, you will have a horrible time and they will rip and look stupid.

I frosted with a white frosting because then when you bite in you really get the full effect of "shit man, there's colorz here". Frost 'em, stack 'em and serve 'em. If you want, you can hire a wood worker to make a giant display for you and pretend that you're on Cupcake Wars. You're not. Don't even pretend you are. You just made cupcakes with a box of mix and a can of soda. They would be ashamed of you.


Enjoy!